Different Communication Styles

Different Communication Styles
Our experiences shape our vocabulary, so it’s natural that our experiences also shape the way we send and interpret messages when speaking verbally and non-verbally. For example, as little girls, women were taught to make friends and establish bonds. On the other hand, as little boys, men were taught to compete. As a result, you may find the following idiosyncrasies in the workplace:

Small talk - observe a group of the same sex in your office and you’ll notice that women share their personal problems while men share hobbies or mutual interests.
Information - women see information as a means to an end (i.e. work together to get it done or sometimes gossip LOL), but men see information as power (i.e. want personal credit when getting done or won’t stop to ask for directions LOL).

Opposing views - women use personal experiences as evidence while men focus on direct statements to prove something is right or wrong.
Agreements - women nod to mean “I hear you,” but men nod to mean “I agree with you.”
Informal gatherings - women think playing golf, going out for a drink, and small talk before a meeting is “manly” or a waste of time, but men know informal gatherings are when most important decisions are made. Women attend formal meetings to weigh in on decision making, while men understand that the meeting doesn’t happen in the meeting. The purpose of the meeting is to confirm what has already been decided at the informal gatherings.
Meetings - women think it is impolite to interrupt when someone is speaking, but men compete in meetings to be heard. While women may think interrupting is rude, men think women take too long to make a point due to personal details.
Although it may be uncomfortable to change the way one communicates, men should be encouraged to join in on the personal part of discussions and women should be aware of when conversations become too lengthy. Women should also realize that personal details often undermine the message being conveyed. To find a middle ground, some helpful guidelines for women to follow are:

Make direct eye contact when speaking
Project your voice at a medium level, but do not over-compensate
Do not acknowledge or address anyone who interrupts when you are speaking
Do not sound like you’re the follower if you’re the leader
Make your words specific and precise
Support your opinions by facts, data, or evidence - not personal experience
Take ownership, use “I” instead of “we” to describe your work

Body language is another biggie. Because women are taught to bond, they prefer to face the person they are speaking with. But men view direct face to face as a competitive stance. For women, if you are not facing each other, then you are not listening. For men, standing or sitting side by side while looking at the report together instead of each other is just fine. If a woman tries to force a man to face her, the man may become uncomfortable with her defensive/aggressive approach. These differences are not right or wrong, but they often result in confusion and conflict.
As a male or female, have you noticed these different communication styles in your office?